We end up talking for hours a day on the phone and Skypeing for months. A few weeks in, he told me I was almost perfect, except my upper arms were fat. So I told this mystery person to call the cops. I played with the chinchilla a bit, and she kinda got mad at me for playing with it and back in the purse it went. We decided to go get dinner, and she was even better in person. My girlfriend and I broke up a few weeks ago. A man with a machete. I think he meant it as a compliment. What if they secretly have a face tattoo? A date with odd fetishes.
He had loads of swords and machetes on the wall and decided to hold one to my throat to show me how incredibly strong they were. I spent a week messaging a few girls and decided to meet the first of these girls to put my plan into action. He chooses being in the closet over our relationship. It takes me an hour to drive there, and I arrive at the restaurant before she does a good thirty minutes before our date, so I could be prepared. A date who decided to stay in the closet. She only wanted to communicate through email or the dating site — which I thought was odd but just went with it. I usually leave my phone in my truck until lunch, so when I went out for lunch at noon, I had new texts and 48 missed calls. I went as hipster Hitler. Two weeks later the stress of our relationship too much for him. These 15 stories of online dating disasters will feed your biggest paranoias. At the bar we had a drink and she revealed how she was a model and how she needed money for rent. I moved his hand away. Without asking, she reached over and started picking toppings of my pizza. Left 5 minutes later. He asked if the guy was named XXX. Now I have herpes. Year later still in love. I arrived on the date, all happy, but realized that the girl who sat was a year old lady with two children and was just finding an excuse to leave her house. I gave in and signed up for my first online dating site. Then I left…and he had the nerve to text me times telling me I was a stuck up bitch. How would we do that? I played with the chinchilla a bit, and she kinda got mad at me for playing with it and back in the purse it went. A crazy, suicidal date. After a few OkCupid attempts I ended up dating a guy a few times. Met up with a girl I met on pof at 3am to bang. A date who asked for money. A few weeks in, he told me I was almost perfect, except my upper arms were fat.
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