However, some people find that medications can help reduce anxiety or impulsivity in individuals. It can get turbulent Picture: Psychotherapy, otherwise known as talk therapy, can be incredibly valuable for treating BPD. Barbara Greenberg , a clinical psychologist who treats patients with BPD, explains: People with BPD benefit from a home environment that is calm and relaxed. With the right tools and community strategies, it is possible to help your loved one towards recovery. Nobody cares about me as much as I care about them, so I always lose everyone I care about—despite the desperate things I try to do to stop them from leaving me. How should I structure the home environment? Everything is done with passion, but it goes from being very happy and passionate to very disappointed and rageful. This type of communication is not about winning an argument or being right.
All involved family members including a boyfriend or girlfriend should know not to discuss important issues when the individual is in crisis mode. Prior to her diagnosis, her boyfriend, Thomas, used to blame himself for her hot and cold behavior. All threats of suicide should be taken seriously. What can I do when I feel overwhelmed? If an individual with BPD experience intense symptoms, such as self-injury or physically harming others, they may be in need of inpatient treatment at a hospital or other residential program. This is not helpful and certainly not an easy quality to deal with in someone you share your life with, but the key to it working is understanding why the person does the things they do so you can work together to help them. They struggle to gauge what is a minor issue and what is a full blown catastrophe. You may wonder whether you should let them borrow money again or answer the dozens of voicemails they left on your phone. For Thomas, educating himself about BPD helped him move from self-blame to empathy and compassion: Paradoxically, the overwhelming fear manifests in behaviors that deeply disrupt the relationship and pushes partners away rather than pulls them closer, resulting in a stormy and tumultuous dynamic that typically emerges in the early days of dating. What if they threaten to hurt themselves? Some of the comments hit home because, from an early age, I have had an extremely tempestuous love life, but I also know it can work if both partners learn to understand each other. While someone with depression or anxiety may feel that they are experiencing symptoms that are different from their normal state, people with personality disorders often fail to realize that their emotions and reactions depart from the typical human experience. When people pull away for any reason, that part of our illness goes into overdrive and this is where the disorder may get its bad name. Allowing them some amount of agency in of deescalating a crisis can help calm out of control emotions. How should I structure the home environment? Having such strong emotions make people with BPD incredibly empathetic, and because of this we find it easy to connect with people on an emotional level quickly. There are a lot of nuances, complexities, and lines to be read through with BPD, but mostly I see Borderline Personality Disorder as an illness about pain, fear, and struggling to cope with all of that. Close Passion and Fear in BPD Relationships Borderline Personality Disorder is a chronic and complex mental health disorder marked by instability, and interpersonal relationships are often the stage on which this instability plays out. The less an individual feels like his or her mental illness is under the spotlight, the more opportunity they have to explore other aspects of themselves. What other strategies can reduce conflict? To date there are no drugs approved by the FDA that have been specifically created to treat personality disorders. Often, this emptiness and intense fear of abandonment are the result of early childhood trauma and the absence of secure, healthy attachments in the vital formative years. Hostile family environments, childhood abuse and neglect, and separation from caregivers can also increase the risk. When a loved one becomes reactive, they may become to insult you or make unfair accusations. These thoughts may be completely at odds with your own perception of your partner, but it is imperative to understand that for them, they are very real, and can drive them toward extreme and seemingly irrational behavior.
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