Although most members are from the United Kingdom, there are also members from the US and other countries. For details go to: They reach out to me, share my posts and my talks on their social media platforms, and contact my fellow activists when I refuse to collaborate with them. We are not on the same side of this war. Herpes Support Groups and Herpes Social Groups Many cities and regions all over the world have herpes support and social groups which have social events and activities where members can make friends in a safe and welcoming community. These websites enable the self-segregation of the H community in a way that I believe contributes to our invisibility and inertia. Some of these groups are support or social groups, others are specifically for people who are looking to date others in the general H community. A booming app industry in Silicon Valley means that new STI dating services pop up every few months, and a cursory Google search means that their marketing team, or their founder, or their intern, quickly discovers me. I want to address the companies that profit off of them. Let me be very clear:
These folks would be better served by a support community than a dating app. Meet People With Herpes. Some of these websites claim to empower their customers. The only people who ask me about herpes dating sites have just been diagnosed and are still daunted by the idea of disclosing—a fear I encourage them to tackle instead of pursuing these trap door dating sites. They are supportive of local H social groups and social events. I will never endorse an STI dating site. You cannot say your service fights STI stigma when it relies on stigma to exist. STI dating services are a product of the stigma, not an empowering way out of it. Some of them bring on consultants in the sexual health world, but only after the fact, and by and large their founders do not come from our community. The company is based in Canada. We are not on the same side of this war. Their parent company also owns Match. Although these groups are NOT dating services and are primarily for making new friends, many people do meet others who they end up dating, even getting married and having kids. These companies are nothing but vultures, co-opting the language of activism. Denying that is intellectually dishonest. But they are just as often predatory environments where newly diagnosed men and women but usually women are bombarded with attention. Herpes dating services have been around since the Internet was invented, thanks to a powerful social stigma that makes disclosing your STI status a frightening prospect for many of us. There are a few other active herpes dating sites and apps, but to our knowledge, the ones listed here have the most members. They send a progressive message to no one. Below the first list of Herpes Dating Services is a list of Regular Online Dating Services where many people with herpes also date successfully. Although most members are from the United Kingdom, there are also members from the US and other countries. What we need is better sex education and health care, access to therapy and more representation. When posting personal ads on Non-H dating sites, some people choose to disclose their herpes status up front, while others prefer to wait. As time goes on and stigma lessens, there will be less of a demand for these services. I politely declined for a second time.
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