Sitting in one of the chairs, I clasped my hands together and prayed for good news. Did I mention tech guys? Just text me your address. The entire concept of swiping was elusive to me, since I had coupled up with somebody shortly after internet app dating became a thing. I made a grab for my laptop and shook the water off. I breezed through my day, feeling high just off the idea of an overdue hot new rendezvous. Guys with glasses on. One was reading a book. I still felt confident in myself. It was between two guys.
I had now broken the record for the most expensive coffee date in history. The computer started gurgling and then made electricity sounds like the ones you hear coming from haunted houses at Halloween. He knew what I looked like, I knew what he looked like, and we had chatted on the phone before so I knew the voice. I whipped through the streets and sprinted to the store. He was just being a nice gentleman by offering to pay. In short, I never defended myself -- a fact I hated. I brushed it off like no big deal. Feeling nervous and watching little beads of sweat develop on my hands, I asked for arbitration as one last ditch effort to come to a peaceful conclusion. I breezed through my day, feeling high just off the idea of an overdue hot new rendezvous. Ten more minutes, no word. I had spent my early and mid-twenties indulgently devoted to another, and I knew it was time I directed some of that same reverence toward myself. Guys next to a freshly caught fish so many fish?? I enjoyed my own company. Thursday morning arrived and I was ready for my re-do with Jake. I made a grab for my laptop and shook the water off. On my way, the prospect text me, saying he was about to leave and would see me soon. I stood up for myself and I know I can do it again. I still felt confident in myself. He also never admitted any wrongdoing; he said he never spilled the tea in the first place. Frankly, I was pretty impressed by the pool of profiles I found myself wading in that fated Friday evening. It was good I was stood up because it showed his true colors. Once I had decided I was ready — ready to be vulnerable again, to put myself out there after nearly five years — I did what I assume most people but especially my fellow virgos do: While waiting for our day in court to arrive, I received several phone calls from various reality court television executives asking me to take my case to the small screen. Guys with their shirts off. I knew that inside me I was mad, I had never experienced being stood up like that before, and I should be mad, right? I avoided my favorite coffee house not only to save money, but to avoid bad tea memories from resurfacing. I hung up, put the phone back in my purse, and started walking down to the beach in front of me.
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