Sometimes white girls hid me from their family, especially their father. The shoe was on the other foot for once and so be it if two white people wound up dead. It's nothing to walk past a random black woman on the street and get a death glare and maybe even overhear something like, "They're taking all of our men. That said, I understand where the ideal comes from. As a black man, it invalidates the authenticity of any relationships I have with white women. My attraction to them was likely a natural response to my environment. Whatever I learned from the trial was tucked away as something that I should know as a black man, but it didn't have a life-altering impact on my own development. I've been with many black women. We'd lost many more. I totally get where black women are coming from, too. I've had varying degrees of romance with women of most races—beyond the black and white binary. A lot of white women have been extremely accepting of and loving towards me my entire life and that's all there is to it. Even if you're smart enough to look at the woman you're dating as a human and not a prized object, that mentality is still going to be cast upon you. Am I secretly one of those black guys who thinks white women are better and hotter and I'm just not ignorant enough to admit it? But outside of those situations, I'm not thinking about race like that.
But outside of those situations, I'm not thinking about race like that. That comes with the territory. But because I know I'm not one of those sellouts, I feel no guilt about dating white women. All I saw around me were white girls. I've been with many black women. Shit is crazy out here. But you still get looks. Before I was even 10, I started having crushes on girls, trying to get my first kiss, and all of that. White women are sadly some type of trophy and marker of success, and that's a huge fucking problem. I never consciously set out to date white women. That's harsh, but that's the historical context of black men dating white women that I unfortunately have to consider when doing the same. Successful minorities love to say, "You're privileged but I'm so smart and awesome and financially secure that I have the same, if not better, house, car, and woman as you. Let's be real, blonde hair and blue eyes are fucking attractive and thinking that doesn't mean you're a piece of shit who gives those features inherent value over the features of other races. I'd let her know when I'd be outside. I'm not a "black man" who "dates white women. As a black man, it invalidates the authenticity of any relationships I have with white women. Kanye West once rapped about how successful black men will "leave your ass for a white girl," and then put himself into that box by marrying a white woman, furthering the pervasiveness of flawed, generic ideas about interracial relationships. For whatever implications the trial had, that shit also had nothing to do with me. I totally get where black women are coming from, too. It was cold, hard, classic revenge. White women range from those so intrigued by black men that it veers into fetish to those so reluctant to date black men that it feels more racist than preference-driven. I went to a black high school and I wasn't on any of that thug shit and I'm not saying all black women want thugs, but at my high school, a lot of them did and they didn't really care about me. It's nothing to walk past a random black woman on the street and get a death glare and maybe even overhear something like, "They're taking all of our men. I fall in love indiscriminately, but third parties will never let it be that simple for me. Though this very article was written in an attempt to bring context to these consistently misunderstood relationships, I don't have to explain who I date to anyone.
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